Upside down 2: The WORRIES of this life…

(Updated and refreshed from 2011)

“The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful.” (Matthew 13:22)

The Upside Down Reality

When I read the parable of the sower (or the soils), it reveals yet another upside-down way we tend to think.

In the world’s system, worry is normal—even expected. It’s often seen as responsible, caring, and even necessary. But in God’s Kingdom, worry is not something to embrace—it’s something to release.

The World’s Perspective

We live in a culture that constantly feeds worry, anxiety, and fear.

News outlets thrive on keeping people concerned about today, tomorrow, and the future. Fear increases viewership—it keeps people watching. From political unrest and natural disasters to crime, accidents, and even the latest “can’t-miss” deal, the message is clear: be concerned, be alert, don’t fall behind.

And we’ve learned to live the same way.

I’ve heard so many parents express how worried they are about their children—their choices, their safety, their future. That worry often becomes a badge of honor, almost as if it proves how much they love.

If it’s not our children, it’s something else—our jobs, our health, our finances, our relationships. And sometimes, even when everything is going well, we still find ourselves worrying about what might happen.

It’s almost as if we’ve been conditioned to believe that worry equals responsibility.

If I don’t worry… does that mean I don’t care?

My husband likes to quote a comedian who said,
“Worrying really works! Everything I’ve worried about never happened!”

It’s funny—but it also reveals something deeper.

The Heart Issue

Why do we worry so much? Does it actually change anything?

“Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” (Matthew 6:27)

Haven’t we heard that anxiety, worry and fear can cause health issues?  Where does this come from anyway and why is it so much a part of our Christian lives? Most people don’t want to live in worry, but they don’t know how to stop.

We could probably come up with a multitude of reasons why we worry but in the end we can see the root of it all, our worry reveals something deeper: a struggle to fully trust God.

When we boil it down, worry often exposes a lack of confidence in His goodness, His faithfulness, and His provision. This takes us all the way back to the beginning. In the Garden of Eden, the enemy’s strategy was simple but powerful—cause doubt.

“Did God really say…?” (Genesis 3:1–5)

That same whisper still echoes today—subtly planting fear and questioning God’s character. The lie suggests that God may not come through… that He might be holding something back.

And when we believe that, worry takes root.

God’s Perspective

But God tells a completely different story.

He points us to the lilies of the field—how they grow without striving—and yet are beautifully clothed.
He reminds us that the birds are fed, even though they do not store away in barns.
And then He gently asks: how much more valuable are you?

“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow…” (Matthew 6:33–34)

Jesus says:

“Do not worry about your life… Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom.” (Luke 12:22–32)

He reassures us:

“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you… Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” (John 14:27)

We are instructed:

“Do not be anxious about anything… and the peace of God… will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6–7)

And we are reminded:

“Perfect love drives out fear.” (1 John 4:18)

Over and over again, we hear the same message:
Do not be afraid.

God knows how easily fear can take hold—and how quickly it can choke out His Word, making it unfruitful. So He continually calls us back to Himself:

“Look at Me, My child. Trust Me.”

Turning It Right Side Up

So how do we actually live this out? If we’re honest, we tend to trust those we truly know. The same is true in our relationship with God.

If we only know about Him, worry will still find a place to grow. But when we begin to truly know Him—His heart, His character, His faithfulness—trust starts to replace fear.

This isn’t about striving to do more for God. It’s about intentionally pursuing Him. Spending time in His Word—not out of obligation, but out of desire to know Him. Asking Him to reveal His heart. Letting His truth take root deep within us.

As that happens, His Word begins to grow and flourish in our hearts—and it is no longer choked out by the worries of this life.

A Simple Perspective Shift

One of our favorite movie lines comes from Bridge of Spies. When asked if he was worried about an upcoming exchange, the spy simply replied:

“Would it help?”

Such a simple question—but incredibly revealing.

Because the honest answer is: No.

So, if worry doesn’t help… why do we keep holding onto it?

Father, I pray that we would set our hearts on truly knowing You—understanding Your love, Your faithfulness, and Your goodness toward us. Help us to recognize the lies we have believed and replace them with the truth of who You are.

Teach us to trust You more and more. Reveal Your heart to us in deeper ways, so that Your perfect love would drive out every fear within us.

We choose to place our worries into Your hands, knowing that You care for us completely.

In Jesus’ name, amen.

---

Selah: Reflection and Pause

What worries have been quietly taking root in your heart?

Have you been carrying them as a sign of responsibility—or even love?

Do you truly trust that God cares for you and will provide for what you need?

What would it look like to intentionally pursue knowing Him more in this season?

Take a moment to sit with Him.
Invite Him to reveal where fear has replaced trust—and allow His truth to take its place.

“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7)

Worry, Fear and.... Unforgiveness

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7

The other day I was thinking about recent conversations I have had with some Christian friends and was marveling once again at how easily and quickly we fall into worry and fear. As I was pondering this, the Lord spoke to my heart and said:

"Fear is like unforgiveness in that, the only one it hurts is YOU"!

Wow. Ok, Lord! I had never thought about it in that way before, but after a few moments of thought, I realized just how true that was!

Unforgiveness

I have heard it said that unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person —the one we refuse to forgive— to die! There is so much written about unforgiveness available in books, podcasts, and sermons, so I won't belabor it, but the bottom line is, if we expect unforgiveness to hurt the other person, we are mistaken.

Unforgiveness only hurts us and can cause debilitating anger, resentment, and bitterness in our own hearts while the other person we refuse to forgive may be completely unaware and unaffected. 

Let's look at worry, fear and anxiety

Worry, fear and anxiety are basically all the same in that they result from a lack of faith and trust in God. There are many studies that show how worry and anxiety affect our mental and physical health in dramatic and devastating ways. When we allow fear and worry to consume us, our bodies and minds take the hit, just like unforgiveness.

So just like unforgiveness, when we fear or worry, the only one that is affected by it, is us! 

You Choose

I get an email from Project Happiness every day and one day I got one that said:

"Faith and Fear both demand that you believe in something you cannot see. You choose".

I was like, Whoa!! That was profound! It puts things, regarding faith and fear, in a whole new perspective that I hadn't seen before. We can’t see either of them but we actually DO have a choice!

What Does the Bible Say About Fear

How many times in the Bible does it say "Do not fear"? I have heard that it was 365 times – once for each day of the year-- but decided to verify that myself and found this website: Does the Bible say "Fear not" 365 times? 

Sadly, according to the website, that saying is not true but, depending on your version of the Bible, it does say it 70 to 100 times, which is still a lot of times!

The website lists these very good and impactful scriptures:

• "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."  Joshua 1:9 
• “But now, this is what the LORD says-- he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine."  Isaiah 43:1

• “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”  Isaiah 41:10

After a quick search myself, I pulled out these scriptures:

·       "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27 

·       "So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?" Hebrews 13:6 

·       "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love." 1 John 4:18 

·       "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

After reading these scriptures, I can't help but wonder: Why do we fall into fear so easily!?

We have an amazing, powerful, loving, righteous God who knows us intimately, calls us His own, promises that He will provide for us and protect us and vows that He will never leave us or forsake us!! So why do we still struggle with fear??

Maybe it is because we don’t know him, love Him or trust Him like we thought we did??

A Personal Lesson in Trust

One day during our "Crazy Journey" back in 2007 and 2008 (which I share in From Caterpillars to Butterfly's), things were not going at all the way we thought they would go (very much like the disciples believing Jesus, as the Messiah, was going to restore Israel by becoming an earthy king) and I was full of stress, anxiety and fear, and the Lord asked me:

 "Linda, do you trust me?"

I said, “Yes Lord, I trust you.”

He asked me again:

"Linda, do you trust me?"

I answered, “Yes Lord, I trust you!”

And he asked again:

"Linda, do you trust me?"

At that point I couldn’t help but laugh out loud because it sounded SO familiar! He had done the same thing to Peter when he asked him three times if he loved him. (John 21:16-17)

But God had made His point and impressed upon my heart that, while I was saying I trusted Him, I truly did NOT trust him like I thought I did. I knew I should trust him, and wanted to trust him, but when the chips were down, and the rubber met the road, it was clear that I wasn’t as surrendered and trusting as I wanted to be.

The Journey of Trust

Isn’t that what our “Journey to Know God” is all about? To build our relationship with the Lord, through the circumstances He allows in our lives, so that we can grow in our knowledge and love of Him so much that we can trust Him with anything and everything that comes our way.

To have no fear in life no matter what happens because we KNOW that God is with us... even unto death.

We all experience moments of fear when something threatens, which is natural. But living in fear or being fearful shows how little we actually trust God.

The irrationality of Fear

Speaking of “even unto death.” There is a show I like to watch called "The Irrational" and it is about a world-renowned behavioral scientist who specializes in people's irrational behavior and the ways they make illogical decisions. As Christians, I think it is irrational for us to fear death.

Why are we so afraid of dying? If our belief is that we will be with our amazing God when our physical form dies, how can that possibly be a bad thing or something to fear? Why do we pray so hard for believers who are dying to be healed when we know they will be in a far better place, out of pain and suffering and with our loving Savior? And why do we get so angry at Him if He doesn’t heal?

It seems so irrational for us to be afraid and worry as much as we do when we have so many scriptures, promises and experiences of God taking care of us.

Worry Makes Us Unfruitful

In the parable of the Soils, it says: 

"Listen then to what the parable of the sower means: ... The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful. But the one who received the seed that fell on good soil is the man who hears the word and understands it. He produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown." Matthew 13:18-23 

This is yet another perspective of how worry and fear can be harmful to us!! It can make us "unfruitful" for the Kingdom.

If the world sees Christians being just as fearful, anxious, stressed, and worried as they are, why would they want what we have?? Our witness therefore becomes ineffective and fruitless for the Kingdom.

Perfect Love Casts Out Fear

​​

I love Oswald’s February 21^st devotional as it gives some insight as to how we can demonstrate our love to God:

​Do You Really Love Him?
Mark 14:6​ - ​"Leave her alone, said Jesus. "Why are you bothering her? She has done a beautiful thing to me.​"

If what we call love doesn't take us beyond ourselves, it is not really love. If we have the idea that love is characterized as cautious, wise, sensible, shrewd, and never taken to extremes, we have missed the true meaning. This may describe affection and it may bring us a warm feeling, but it is not a true and accurate description of love​...

… To be surrendered to God is of more value than our personal holiness. Concern over our personal holiness causes us to focus our eyes on ourselves, and we become overly concerned about the way we walk and talk and look, out of fear of offending God. ". . . but perfect love casts out fear . . ." (1Jo_4:18). We should quit asking ourselves, "Am I of any use?" and accept the truth that we really are not of much use to Him. The issue is never of being of use, but of being of value to God Himself. Once we are totally surrendered to God, He will work through us all the time.

​Our value to him is being able to bear fruit, fruit that will last (John 15:16). When we completely surrender to Him, without fear, worry or anxiety, THEN God can work through us and produce fruit for His Kingdom.

Is our love for God taking us beyond ourselves? Or are we so focused on ourselves and concerned about what others think? In the Oswald scripture, Mary was all IN and didn’t care a bit what others thought. Jesus’ perfect love for her cast out her fear.

So, let’s ask ourselves: Are we holding onto fear the way some people hold onto unforgiveness?

Insight from Chet

As a finishing touch, I thought I would end with Chet's (AI ChatGPT) input on this subject:

I asked Chet: "Biblically speaking, would you agree that worry and unforgiveness are similar?"

Chet: Yes, biblically speaking, worry and unforgiveness share similarities because both involve a lack of trust in God and can weigh heavily on the heart.

1. Lack of Trust in God – Worry stems from fear of the future, while unforgiveness often comes from holding onto past hurts. Both suggest a struggle to fully surrender to God’s control. Jesus emphasized trust in Matthew 6:25-34, urging His followers not to worry because God provides. Likewise, Paul encourages believers to "forgive one another as God in Christ forgave you" (Ephesians 4:32), showing that forgiveness is a form of trust in God's justice and mercy.

(Tom: Actually, it is the Cross of Christ that bought forgiveness for us, not God’s justice and mercy. Those were WHY Jesus came and died for us. So our trust is in the finished work of the Cross.)

2. Bondage vs. Freedom – Worry keeps a person trapped in anxiety, just as unforgiveness keeps them chained to resentment. Both can consume thoughts, emotions, and spiritual well-being. Jesus came to set people free (John 8:36) and offered peace that surpasses understanding (Philippians 4:6-7).
3. Hindrance to Prayer and Relationship with God – Both worry and unforgiveness can hinder a close relationship with God. Jesus taught that if we do not forgive, our Father will not forgive us (Matthew 6:14-15). Similarly, worry can distract from a prayerful, trusting heart and lead to self-reliance rather than faith.
4. Spiritual Warfare – The enemy often uses worry and unforgiveness to keep believers ineffective. Paul reminds us in 2 Corinthians 10:5 to take every thought captive to Christ, whether it’s fear-driven worry or bitterness from past offenses.

So, in a way, both worry and unforgiveness are burdens that weigh down the soul, and God calls His people to release both into His hands. 

​Brilliant!!

Father, thank you so much for this insight!! Please help me to know you more so that I would love you more and then learn to trust you more. I truly don't want to be weighed down by the burdens of worry and fear. And I don’t want to be unfruitful in my walk with You. Please open my eyes to see you in new, wonderful, transforming, and trusting ways. And help me to surrender any unforgiveness, worry, fear and anxiety that are both large and hidden in my heart. In Jesus name, amen.

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28   

“Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom” Luke 12:32

“He replied, "You of little faith, why are you so afraid?" Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.” Matthew 8:26

“But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid." Matthew 14:27

“Ignoring what they said, Jesus told the synagogue ruler, "Don't be afraid; just believe." Mark 5:36

“Do not be afraid of what you are about to suffer. I tell you, the devil will put some of you in prison to test you, and you will suffer persecution for ten days. Be faithful, even to the point of death, and I will give you the crown of life.” Revelation 2:10

Forged in Fire...

“Everyone will be salted with fire.” Mark 9:49

Tom and I like to watch a program called “Forged in Fire”. It is a competition between 4 blade smiths, one at a time being eliminated after a series of tests of their skills and blades, ending with one champion. When the program first came on Tom watched it by himself but one day I wandered in while he was watching it and I the next thing I knew, I was hooked as well! I LOVE the heart and attitudes of the smiths as well as watching what amazing blades they produce with metal, fire, hammers and grinding! Truly an art form!

“If any man builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, his work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each man's work.” 1 Corinthians 3:12-13

Years ago Tom and I were struggling in our marriage, and with life in general, and one day Tom said to me that he felt like he was being forged like a piece of metal that God was heating up and hammering over and over again! This was a great visual and analogy for what we have come to believe God is actually doing with us! We believe that our circumstances in life are perfectly ordained by God as refining fires so that He can remove the dross in our hearts and minds. And once we are purified and ready, then He can begin the forging process to shape and mold us into the tools and/or weapons He needs us to be for HIS Kingdom purposes and His Glory! I have called Tom my “refining fire” many times as it seems like he brings out the worst in me!! LOL! Over time, in my marriage and relationship with Tom, the Lord has revealed my true heart… the heart I didn’t even realize I had until my circumstances caused all the yuck (or dross) to surface. Examples being: my self-righteousness, pride, arrogance, judgmentalism, criticism, people pleasing, approval seeking, control issues, OCDness… And the list goes on! I often mention the book “Lies Women Believe and the Truth that Sets them Free” by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. She says that the lie is, that our circumstances “make” us who we are, but the truth is, that they “reveal” who we are!! I love that!

“John answered them all, "I baptize you with water. But one more powerful than I will come, the thongs of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire.” Luke 3:16

It is only through hard and difficult circumstances that we are able to see the fear, impatience, anxiety, stress, anger, guilt and shame that is in our hearts, and this is so we can take it to God and allow Him to transform our hearts and minds into what He has designed us to be.

We have a tendency to see hard and difficult circumstances as an attack from the enemy or blame others for the things that happen to us. But if we change that perspective and see it as ordained by God, we can look to HIM and ask what it is that we need to learn from these hard things! Graham Cooke has a great story that he shares regarding this that we heard about 10 years ago and Tom and I have referenced it many times saying, “Never resent the “tools” God uses to shape and mold us!”: Throne Room

 “…for our "God is a consuming fire." Hebrews 12:29

“If you will give God your right to yourself, He will make a holy experiment out of you --- and His experiments always succeed. The one true mark of a saint of God is the inner creativity that flows from being totally surrendered to Jesus Christ. In the life of a saint there is this amazing Well, which is a continual Source of original life. The Spirit of God is a Well of water springing up perpetually fresh. A saint realizes that it is God who engineers his circumstances; consequently there are no complaints, only unrestrained surrender to Jesus.  Oswald, My Utmost for His Highest, June 13^th

I love how Oswald hits on this topic many times throughout the year, reminding me that it is God who engineers my circumstances and to STOP complaining but just surrender to Jesus, allowing Him to do the work He needs to do in my heart. That is what it is all about, isn’t it? Surrender? That is what the metal does in the smith’s hands, it doesn’t fight back, whine or complain, or try to wiggle out from the hands of the smith, but allows the smith to do his job to make an amazing tool or weapon.

“Do not put out the Spirit's fire…” 1Thessalonians 5:19

I just looked up the process for making a blade and this article breaks it down into 6 steps (How to make a Sword - The six step process). They are clear that this isn’t the complete process but more of a general guideline, which is all I need right now. I wanted to give you an idea of what it takes to forge a sword or tool. This isn’t an easy or quick process, but it takes time, patience, endurance and lots of skill to forge metal! (The Italics and underlining is mine):

The First step is Forging

A bar of the desired metal or combination of metals is heated in a forge and then it is hammered into shape.(The shape of a sword) This hammering process can take a long time and it is called drawing out the sword. The sword is worked on in sections (usually around 6 inches in length) and repeatedly hammered and heated until it comes into the desired shape .This process is repeated many times and the sword is often heated then allowed to cool without hammering. This is required by the metal to keep the desired properties of strength and flexibility. Once this step is completed the sword is in the proper shape but the properties of the metal make it very brittle and something has to be done to give flexibility to it.

Step Two: Annealing

Annealing softens the sword and makes it easy to grind into shape. The sword is now heated and then allowed to cool very slowly. Often it is wrapped in an insulating material to slow down this cooling. It can take as long as 24 hours and this annealing process makes the sword soft and easy to grind.

Step Three: Grinding

Now the blacksmith uses a grinder to work out the edge and point of the sword. This would also be when any engraving is added. This is not a completed sword yet. It is still much too soft so it must be hardened.

Step Four: Hardening

Now the sword is heated to a very high temperature and then placed into a quenching tank. (This is what we always see in the movies). This quenching allows it to cool quickly and evenly which will harden the metal. After this hardening the sword is brittle and something must be done to make it strong yet flexible.

Step Five: Tempering

Again the blade is heated and quenched. But now the heating is at a much lower

temperature than was used at the hardening. This heating/quenching cycle may be repeated several times. This tempering allows the blade to be strong but not brittle. This is one stage where the skill and experience of the swordsmith is invaluable. It takes a trained hand and eye to understand the properties of the metal. It will have a certain amount of flexibility yet still retain its sharp edge. Now the sword is ready for completion.

Step Six: Completion

The sword blade itself is now complete. Now the additional parts will be added such as the pommel, the guard and the hilt.

“In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith--of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire--may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.” 1 Peter 1:6-7

This forging process is quite lengthy and it takes time to do it right! We live in a society of instant gratification and we have little patience for things that take too long… (WHAT! 6 minutes to microwave my dinner!? That’s crazy! LOL!). But God is not in a hurry and He will do whatever He needs to do, and take as long as He needs to take, to make a great work of art!

While our trials and difficulties may seem like they are too difficult and even “unfair”, thinking about them in this new way may help you get through these tough times. What dross is this “fire” bringing up in me? Am I making the process more difficult by resisting, fighting, feeling sorry for myself or complaining? I have to admit, I am guilty on all counts!! DOH!

Father, Help me to surrender at all times to your refining and forging process! Help me to relax and trust that You have this and that You are a very skilled Smith who knows what You are doing… even if it looks like you don’t! Thank you for being patient with my wiggling, whining and complaining and for this reminder that when you are done, I will be exactly what you need me to be, a wonderful work of art, for Your purposes and for Your Glory! Help me to be a strong yet flexible weapon that You can be proud of!

“I have come to bring fire on the earth, and how I wish it were already kindled!” Luke 12:49

“They saw what seemed to be tongues of fire that separated and came to rest on each of them.” Acts 2:3